Week 1 of Counting Calories

So I've made it my first week of counting calories. I've lost 9 lbs. already, I can't notice it really but hopefully I will soon. Since I lost that amount already my fiance wants to join me. He can eat more calories than I can. He gets 1575 and I only get 1200. But I am happy with what I can eat. I can change meals around to where every now and then... I can have those fast foods that I like, not all of them but some of them. If the calories are high in that one meal I really want, I can eat something earlier or later with lower calories. This way, I'm not depriving myself completely. If I need a little chocolate, I still eat my Almond Snickers, with 280 calories. But I don't go over my calorie intake. If I do a little, it's okay, because what I consume in a day now if what I use to consume in one meal!

Starting a Diet

So, I've decided to join my friend and start a diet. She's been counting calories for a month and a week, and lost 12 lbs. We are about the same height and she allows herself 1200 calories a day. I did some research on webMD and to loose 2 lbs. a week, I should only consume 1200 calories a day. I am adding a workout each morning to my diet and hope I get to my goal a little faster. Well, hopefully this works!

The Ghost Hunt

So, since the last story I posted... I decided to have some of my friends over to investigate my house... We had a little ghost hunt from 12am to 4am. All of us were in the livingroom, one of my friends and myself heard someone open and close the back laundryroom door twice then walk into the kitchen with about 7 footsteps.... Be silent for five minutes, then walk back to the laundryroom, then open and close the door two more times. Later that night we heard more small noises like tapping, some banging on the wall, the sound of a foot slam down on the ground between another girl and myself, I also saw someone standing in the kitchen later that night. I haven't looked at the video footage yet, but just from what we experienced, I emailed ghost hunters.

Scary Story

This just happened last night. I don't think I can describe how terrified I was... I was up alone around 11pm, I was making a cd on the computer, and I heard noises coming from the laundryroom. I thought it might be the cats eating, then I walked in the livingroom and both of them were sleeping. I went back to the computer and tried to ignore the sound. I looked over toward the laundryroom door after a while and saw someone looking at me through the window on the door and pushing the door open a little. I immediatly screamed for my fiance who was sleeping and quickly stumbled to the bedroom door from being terrified. I tried screaming for him again and my voice barily came out. I rushed in the door and told him someone was in the house. He loaded his gun and went to the laundryroom. I checked on our daughter meanwhile to make sure she was okay. I heard my fiance talking, so I cautiously walked to the laundryroom. He was giving a warning for whoever was in the house "I'll give you 10 seconds to leave". Nothing happened so he walked toward the back of the laundryroom and into the bathroom. No one was there. The doors were locked. And no one can get out our windows. Lets just say, I had the hardest time staying calm last night and going to sleep... But I wasn't staying up alone.

Paranormal Activity

So, last night I saw Paranormal Activity... It was the scariest movie I have ever seen. Possibly due to the documentary type film and from having my own experiences somewhat similar to the movie... Except for probably the last half hour... Which I am thankful for. I would definitly recommend this movie but if you don't believe in the paranormal, don't bother. The people next to me and in front of me would not stop commenting on the movie throughout the show. It was horrible to pay for a movie when your sitting next to people that don't like it and won't stop talking! My party had to move over but we could still hear them talking. Be polite next time you go to the movies and whisper or just shut up! LOL. The movie would have been scarier if people weren't talking. I will definitly have to rent the movie and watch it in the quiet privacy of my own home.

Looking For New Clients

I just recently started working at Scandals Full Service Salon. I am a hairstylist with 3 years experience looking for some new clients. I am offering discounts in order to build a new clientel. I worked at Beauty Connection for 2 years and had a great clientel but lost them when I left the salon. Most salons don't let you take your clients with you (they don't give you your clients info). I also worked at Regis for 8 months but with the new mall hours, I lost time that I could have worked there which made it not worth it. So, I am starting fresh, I make my own prices, the salon I am in is relaxed and hip. The girls that work here are really nice. I am offering $15 haircuts and 25% off haircolor services. You can call the salon to make an appointment or call me directly. I can fit you into my schedual and I am willing to make late appointments aswell. Scandals number is 442-7700 and my cell is 672-2029.

From the Heart

I really miss my family and all the family gatherings we use to have. It's ashame that we have all moved apart and I hope to create a family that can stay as close as we use to be. Every Christmas, we would get the family together and have a brunch buffet and Grandma's house and open presents. The presents were nice but the best part was having everyone there. It seems that as you grow up, things aren't as wonderful as they always seemed. You become less satisfied and don't like celebrating things because they aren't anything like what they were before. Every time you get your hopes up and get let down when you knew in the first place that it was going to happen. My whole family lived in San Diego, then I moved away, farther and farther every couple of years... Due to my mother and her fiance, so not by choice. Then my grandmother moved from San Diego to Texarkana, Arkansas. She was the heart of the family, but now she's so far away. I still live in Eureka, where my mother, stepfather, and I ended up. And now after they finally got married after 19 years of being engaged, have taken the steps to get divoriced (only married a year). So, my mother is in hiding, avoiding my phone calls, I don't mind seeing my stepfather (after all he did raise me), but he is really down right now and I would like to be more positive. Its hard not being around family, especially because the holidays are coming up and I really want family around. It's nice having get togethers. I miss having that warm loving feeling you get during the holidays when you are surrounded by people that love you. I really want that for my daughter too.

Car Registration Costs

Wow! I got my car registration renewal and its $338! That is $100 more than it was last year!... So, everyone, since we are in a recession, lets go ahead and raise costs that most people have to pay so we can pay our debt. This is rediculous. People are having a hard enough time as it is, I don't think we need anymore bills. I don't see how everyone is going to be able to keep their vehicles this year and the next. Normally when your bill is too high, there is someone to complain to and you will most likely get it lowered... But when it comes to the government, they get to do whatever the hell they want!

Unfair

This was an email to me from my dad...

Financial planning 101 for our elected officials - This course should be compulsory!!!You have 2 families... " Joe Legal" and "Jose Illegal". Both families have 2 parents, 2 children and live inCalifornia ." Joe Legal" works in construction, has a Social Security Number, and makes $25.00 per hour with payroll taxes deducted."Jose Illegal" also works in construction, has NO Social Security Number, and gets paid $15.00 cash "under the table".Joe Legal.. $25..00 per hour x 40 hours = $1000.00 per week = $52,000 per year. Now take 30% away for state and federal tax. Joe Legal now has $31,231.00.Jose Illegal... $15.00 per hour x 40 hours = $600.00 per week = $31,200.00 per year. Jose Illegal pays no taxes. Jose Illegal now has $31,200.00.Joe Legal pays for Medical and Dental Insurance with limited coverage. $1000..00 per month = $12,000.00 per year. Joe Legal now has $19,231.00.Jose Illegal has full Medical and Dental coverage through the state and local clinics at a cost of $0.00 peryear. Jose Illegal still has $31,200.00.Joe Legal makes too much money to be eligible for Food Stamps or Welfare so Joe Legal pays for food... $1,000.00 per month = $12,000..00 per year. Joe Legal now has $7,231.00.Jose Illegal has no documented income and is eligible for Food Stamps and Welfare. Jose Illegal still has$31,200.00.Joe Legal pays rent of $1,000.00 per month = $12,000.00 per year. Joe Legal is now in the hole -<$4,769.00>.Jose Illegal receives a $500 per month Federal rent subsidy, which entirely pays his rent of $500.00 per month = $6,000.00 per year. Jose Illegal still has$31,200.00.Joe Legal now works overtime on Saturdays and gets a part time job after work to make ends meet.Jose Illegal has nights and weekends off to enjoy with his family..Joe Legal's and Jose Illegal's children both attend the same school.Joe Legal pays for his children's lunches while Jose Illegal's children get free government sponsored lunches.Joe Legal's children go home after school. Jose Illegal's children have an after school ESL program which, again, is provided free of charge.Joe Legal and Jose Illegal both enjoy the same Police and Fire Services, but Joe Legal paid for them and Jose Illegal did not pay.ARE YOU MAD YET?!?!?!You should be!!!Pass this along to all the Blue and White collar Americans that are struggling from paycheck to paycheck to provide for their families.This is an outrage that HAS to be addressed.THIS is the time to get things started.We are poised on the brink of oblivion and it will take nothing short of an avalanche to get the bureaucrats to take action.

You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich. You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong. You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift. You cannot lift the wage earner up by pulling the wage payer down. You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred. You cannot build character and courage by taking away people's initiative and independence. You cannot help people permanently by doing for them, what they could and should do for themselves. ......Abraham Lincoln

Dutch Brothers Coffee

Two days ago, I went to Dutch Brothers to get my new found drink "The Cookie". It was recommended to me by one of the baristas. I drank half of my drink and found that it was hard to sip. Something was stuck in my straw. I keep sucking thinking it was ice, then it got to my lips and it was squishy. I then realized that nothing in my drink is this consistency. I pulled away from the straw, and I was staring at the butt of a bee... Stinger and all. I had been sucking on a bee! I took my drink back to show them what was in my drink, they made me a new one which I was unable to drink. And gave me two "free cards". The "free cards" weren't free at all. One I had to pay $1, and the other I had to rent two movies from Spotlight. What would you do if there was a bee in your coffee? I could have been stung by the bee on my tongue! I have been going there for my coffee since it opened in my area. I work at Starbucks but choose to get their coffee... Not anymore. I won't be drinking any coffee for a while now.

Working Your Life Away

I think life should be a lot easier. I mean really, who WANTS to work for their whole life? Not me! I don't know how much the average person works, my fiance works 9 hours a day, which is almost 50 hours a week, and 200 hours in a month. 12 months in a year make that 2400 hours a year. That's ridiculous. We hardly ever have time for each other. And its hard to find family time during the week.... We always spend time with our daughter separately due to work. There are people that pay more attention to their work than their families. If everyone worked better together maybe we wouldn't have to work so much and still survive happily. There are so many people that die of starvation. It's sad that so many kids have parents that would rather shoot up than feed them. It's unbelievable that some girls cant go to school when they have their menstrual cycle because they don't have the money to get the sanitary items. The human race is selfish. We want everything for ourselves and better things than what the other person has. What if everyone had the same things, survived, stayed healthy, lived happily, and essentially lived stress free. Is that too boring for us? Is that why we live like this? There are so many things that need to change, so many people are dying that can be saved. We need to find a solution.

Most Blogs

You know, I think most blogs are complaints... Its sad really. I know mine are. It is so much easier to vent to a piece of paper or a computer screen. Why? Because you don't want to tell someone else. They don't listen, your too embarrased, or you just don't want to involve someone else in your problems. A blog is so much simpler... No back talk, no opinion, you don't have to recieve a relpy if you don't want to, and you don't even have to talk. Just let your thoughts flow through your body, into your fingers, and onto the keyboard. Right? It does amaze me with how many things are possible on the internet but they also feel natural in a way. This is therapy for the price of whatever your internet bill is and how much you paid for your computer! It's cheaper than a therapist!

Friends

I hate not having that many friends. I'm all alone for a week and no one is available to go out with me or just hang out. It sucks that I am actually gonna be completely alone this whole week. Trevor and Alayna just left this morning, I wish I could have gone with them rather than have this feeling of emptiness. This is rediculous. I really should have more friends than this. I have plenty of "friends", I just want more of the ones that I can call up to hang out with.

The Frustration

I try to be less jealous with my fiance because I know that I am overly jealous. We have a baby together so I feel less jealous knowing that he wants to be with me. But I still don't think it's okay for him to be enrolled in a dating service. He says he only did it so his brother could get points and he doesn't pay for it. When I checked it this morning he added a girl in our area as a crush and messaged her. It's not myspace so anything you send someone else is considered flirtatious, right? I am so sick and tired of repeating myself. If I don't want him talking to his ex's on myspace why would he think it's okay to message some girl on a dating service. He wouldn't think it was okay if I did this to him. But he insists, I trust you so it wouldn't bother me. What am I supposed to say if one of my friends or someone else I know sees him on there and tells me. Am I supposed to act like the stupid wife, "Oh yeah I know, it's for his brother." That just makes myself sound so stupid. He doesn't consider how I feel about things in general and just does them without asking me. Where is the F-ing communication? Huh? I don't understand why he makes things seem so difficult. God!!!

Money in a Family

My fiance of five years recently sold a little WW2 Paratrooper Welbike on ebay. In the years that we have lived together, the money in our relationship is our money. We have bills just like any other person and we have a daughter. We have been strapped for cash like a lot of people lately so when he got $7000 for the bike he didn't pay for, we were really happy. The thing was that he didn't talk to me about him splitting the money with his dad. He told me he was going to. It sounded nice at first but as soon as I thought about all of our bills and how much that money could help I didn't think he should give his dad half... Maybe $2000 would be fine but not half. My fiance went through so much trouble getting this bike to ship to the buyer in the UK. His father didn't give him the bike he got it through a coworker. His father made a crate which helped a lot, but I can't understand why he would rather give his dad half of the money than pay off some of our debts. We have been short on money for food! His dad would have been happy with a smaller dollar amout. Along with all of the problem with shipping. The buyer sent us the money for shipping and cost but paypal deducted the entire shipping money. Well, before my fiance knew how much shipping was going to be, he took his fathers half out of the money. Leaving him with $3500. Two weeks later, I get a bill from fedex for $940. My fiance said he will just take it out of his money!!! I couldn't believe this. First he already gave his dad more than what I was comfortable with, second he didn't even ask my opinion, third he would be getting $1000 less than his dad and the money should be going to him. I told him he has to at least get half the shipping cost from his dad. He agrees, then tells me he will pay 400 then split the remainder between him and his dad. This was wrong too!!! He doesnt' realize how his is spliting up the money, it's making me angry that he feels like he has to take care of his dad when he has a family. His father can't work cause he owes for child support and they would deduct the money from his paycheck. That's not my fiance's fault and he shouldn't be responsible for his dad at this point in time. He still has like 20 years to go. We have a family, bills, and we really could of used the money to lower our debts. Especially in this economy. I'm so frustrated and I don't feel like he even tried to see what I thought about this. He makes me feel like it's none of my business.

Finances

Sometimes I take a look at all of my families bills and wonder how our lives would be different if we spend our money on different things and did so wisely. We have two car loans that are more than $800 all together per month and I just imagine what we could do with that money. I mean seriously. We would have more money for groceries and clothes. It's funny to see what we over all trade things for. It is great that we have two reliable vehicles but I do wish we had more money and didn't have to worry about debt so much. I just claimed bankruptcy and don't plan on doing it again. I don't want anymore high credit card bills and I really want to put my money to good use. We don't need two vehicles but in the future we will. It is better to pay for them now and not worry about it when we move down south where it's more expensive to live. After the cars are paid off, we will be able to buy a house, which will be great. We need to stop trading in our vehicles and I'm hoping that my fiances truck will be the last vehicle change for at least 10 years. I want us to have a good future and not have to worry about money. The economy is doing really bad right now but normally we always find a way to make it through anything. I'm pretty positive but I do have my moments when I think that it's just over and there is no up. I guess I should just get use to having hard times cause life is full of them. I just feel like things could be so much better.

Companies

Don't you ever get frustrated with bad service that you are paying for or bad service from a representative over the phone? I think At&t is probably the worst company ever. Every month I was their customer, there was a problem at least once. I was out of the internet for two weeks in one month! And I have online school. Now I switched to suddenlink and have no problems with the service that I am paying for. But now I just wanted to add more channels which is only supposed to be an extra $15 (so I was told), and now they say oh no it's $35. I already cancelled my blockbuster access account and now I have to reactivate it. This is such a pain! The lady on the phone didn't offer a solution or an appology, she just tried to sell me a phone service. RRR...

I Need Time

I think that I want to get away for a while. Maybe a couple days or maybe a week. Whether it's going to San Francisco with friends or going to my grandma's in Arkansas. I want some time to think about my relationship and the way I've been feeling lately. I know that I love him, but I also know that I refuse to continue feeling the way I do. I don't want to watch him flirt with other girls, and I don't want to feel like I'm the only one that knows he's doing it. I don't want to feel stupid for telling him and I also don't want to feel like I might as well not tell him what's bugging me because he's just going to do it again. I don't want Alayna to be the only reason why I stay with him. I don't want to regret my life with him and I don't want to feel unappreciated. I love him, I show him respect, I never flirt with other guys, and I expect him to do the same for me. Plus, I shouldn't have to state this to him. He should know this on his own. I don't want him to think that it's okay because I will never leave him. He needs to know that I will leave if he doesn't treat me right.

Trust

How would you be able to tell if the one you love really loves you? How are you supposed to know that when they flirt with other girls that they are only thinking of being with you? How can you assure yourself that they are confident in their decision of being with you, when they constantly flirt with their past partner right in front of you? How are you supposed to know that they don't want to go back to them and regret the decision of choosing you over them? How can you trust them at all when all they have ever lied about is that person? Why should you stay with the one you love when you are so unsure of their feelings at certain times even when they try to validate them? Why do I continue writing questions when the first one pretty much says it all? How will I ever know?

The Love of a Mother

There are different types of love, the love of a friend, the love of a partner, but the love for your children is the best of them all. You will never know how much you could possibly love someone until you have a child. The realization of knowing you would do anything for that person is amazing. It overcomes you instantly at the birth of your child, and it is unbelievably stong and overcoming. The feelings can take you over instantly when something happens to your child. Just looking at them when they sleep brings a smile to your face. Thinking about them being hurt causes you to cry. It's truely amazing what motherly love can do. You will never know love until it happens to you.

Debt

I am only twenty-three years old and have already filed bankruptcy. Thinking back on what I spent my credit limits on, I simply cannot remember. Credit cards seem simple enough and its hard to believe that you can become an addict. All it takes is one swipe and a signiture, then what ever it is you desire can be yours. My credit card spending would come in spurts. Use a credit card multiple times until you recieve your credit card statement. You may stop spending for some time, but as soon as you forget why you stopped... It starts all over again, and will continue until the limit has been reached. What now. You could get another and run that up too, or be responsible and pay it off.
Sometimes you will be irresponsible with either decision you make. If you decide to pay it off, most likely you will pay a few hundred and run it up to the limit again. This time, you really need to pay it off. You agree with yourself, that you will stop using it. Now that your payment may be seventy dollars a month on that card, you may have a little amount of spending money. But then, you get in an accident... You were at fault, and oh no... You need to pay the thousand dollar deductible before your vehicle gets fixed. What now? You need an extra thousand dollars that you may have on the credit card ready to use, or you need to get a new one. You don't save money, because if you did, you would have the money to buy the things that you are charging on the credit card.
What if you wanted to start saving? The money that you could save is being spent on your monthly bill to pay your credit card. If you started out by saving, this may not have happened. If you only charged the credit card for things that where really important, like new tires when yours are completely bare or dental work when you are getting a constant migrane just from the pain, maybe you would be in control of your spending. It is crutial to realize that a credit card should only be used when you really need it. Don't use it for cute clothes that you will only wear two times, the sunglasses that you've been wanting, or the vacation of your dreams. When you use your credit card, set a date that you WILL pay that purchase back by. Put a small paper in your wallet with a list of things that you want to achieve in the next five years. Everytime you reach for that credit card, look at the list and ask yourself if this purchase will help you get closer to your goals... Most likely, the answer will be no.
It takes strength to overcome the voice inside your head that says, just do it this once. Realize your problem and come up with ways to over come it. You have to want to change, and try to improve yourself. But it is possible and it can happen.